Dude, I must say… God is indeed, rocking my world. And it is not fun and it is not all that exciting. I have been literally blown by Andy Stanley’s teaching these past few Sundays as he laid down some hard hitting truths about “Faith, Hope & Luck”. Now mind you, Andy rarely teaches @ the Buckhead Church campus, so it was great being able to see him live, raw, and in action – touching on some misunderstood ideas of Christianity. This really opened my eyes to what and why I’ve been feeling the way I have lately.
One thing that stands out to me that I am learning through life is that God is not some “Buy One Get One Free” deal that I can get at the store. He is not a formula or slot machine that I pull down enough times in hoping that I’ll win it big… maybe that’s why North Point used the slot machine theme for this series – I never thought about that (lol). But anyway, as I was saying… a few years ago, I realized that I had been suckered into believing that if I prayed some big prayer or read the Bible enough or did the “right” thing, then God would like me enough to approve what I wanted or give me what I asked for. Over the past 2 years, I’ve grown to see the complete opposite. For so long, I’ve questioned why a lot of preachers say one thing, but have no fruit to show that any of it works. It’s a lot of emotionalism and motivational speaking that is confusing people to believe that God moves to our tempo or something. It’s just stupid.
God is definitely rocking my world because I’m learning to desire Him even when He doesn’t come through or answer or even speak at all (which I’ve never known God to speak verbally to me anyway). He’s rocking my world because He’s challenging my lack of faith and belief in Him. He and I have a love-hate relationship: I love God but I hate this process-thing. It just doesn’t always go my way. I’m learning patience. I’m learning how to lean on His promise even when all I seem to have IS a promise that He’ll never leave me out here alone. I’m learning what real faith looks like and feels like, and it isn’t some alter-call experience or some emotional experience at a church service. It’s having confidence that God is who He says He is and that He will do what He promised He will do. It’s trusting Him and knowing that He will give me grace (strength/power) and mercy (empathy) in my time of need. And even when I can’t seem to get it right or figure Him out, He promised me that He will never leave. And for some reason, that seems to be enough.